An NC or SC beach is an amazing place for your special day…wilderness with amazing power, grace and beauty. It is a living example of the flow of life itself…reflected in the ebb of tides, stormy or pristine days, and the rolling rhythm of the waves. Beaches are also a transitional location for the pivotal times in life: childhood memories, learning to swim, epic romance, special nights under the stars…and your wedding and your vows renewal. Here are some steps to take!

So just how do you throw a beach wedding? What do you do first? Do you need a permit? What about weather? What about chairs, arbor, music, minister, catering or photography? What about guests travelling? And the cost? No worries–the cost and the to-do list for a beach wedding is the same as any other type, and even LESS! (95% of these beaches are FREE-saves you thousands on a venue!)

• Minimum needed in North Carolina is just 6 things–a marriage license and 5 willing people (the couple, two witnesses and legal Officiant). Click here for getting your NC license.
• The minimum needed in South Carolina is just 4 things–a marriage license and 3 willing people (the couple and legal Officiant). However its harder to get an SC license sometimes, click here.

Easiest Way for 30+ guests: A coastal wedding planner or coordinator can create any size wedding event with all the needed service people (called “vendors”) and troubleshoot any “emergencies.” Some planners offer multiple levels of service, depending on how much, or little, assistance you want.

Easiest Way for Elopers or groups under 20 heads: Elope with your marriage license and 2 rings, hire a minister, book a beach hotel or condo, and wed barefoot in the sand, casual or dressy! Hire a photographer or videographer to share your private wedding during a reception party back home. Want flowers or music? We got real florist flowers (ordered to your specs) AND David is a flutist, click here! We also rent our powerful, portable PA to play any songs off your cellphone or ipod.

Want it fancier? Book a beach house or hotel, bring wedding rings, book a restaurant or caterer, book a band, rent or bring decorations and rent chairs, invite Attendants to stand with you, and/or wear formal clothes.

FIRST STEPS, MAKE DECISIONS:
1. Set your budget. You can do a minimal, quick, casual beach wedding/elopement with photos, about $650. Or get just a minister (with sand ceremony and other perks!) for just $300 (or $250 if your are active military/police/fire/EMS or doing a renewal)
2. Set your guest list, if any, and their needs. Such as beds, car parking, transportation to ceremony or reception, pet needs, dining, and the challenges of hot sun and soft sand for elderly or limited mobility. To be honest, the fewer the guests, the better… less stress, less expense, AND have a second celebration/reception back home too! Consider the “politics” and social dynamics among your guests—do they distress or improve the quality of your happiness? You can photo slideshow or video record it for them later.
3. Choose 1-3 favorite beach locations. If you are flexible on location, you may save money.
4. Choose 1-3 dates and times. If you can be flexible, you may save money.
6. Decide formal or casual dress code for self and/or for guests.
8. Decide if you want rented chairs, arbor, and beach decorations (elderly and disabled need seats).
9. Decide if ordering food and cake… choose family cooks, or professional catering, or book a restaurant or a combination.
10. Decide on: traditional or creative, religious or non-religious or spiritual.

SECOND STEPS, TAKE ACTION:
1. Book your accommodations as soon as you set your date and location. These fill up very fast at the beach so do NOT delay on this step.
2. Book an officiant (fyi–judges are prohibited from leaving the courthouse to perform weddings). If you want a non-religious ceremony, say so… some ministers are fine with that. Good ones book up quickly so lock in your Officiant early.
3. Next, book photographers, videographers, musicians and caterers/restaurants. Ask questions and communicate clearly with them.
4. Contact food services, rental businesses, beauty salons, florists and transportation
5. Meanwhile, send out invitations, get your wedding clothes, rings, supplies, accessories
6. (renewals: skip #6 & 7, no license needed) Within 60 days of your wedding date, get your marriage license at the courthouse. Call that office beforehand to confirm what IDs they need!
7. Bring the license to the ceremony and hand it over to Officiant before it begins!

OTHER IMPORTANT INFO:

• Most NC & SC beaches are public property so you may marry almost anywhere on these shores.
• Weather over this geographical area is remarkably stable and predictable, Sunny 85% of the time and infrequent rain showers pass over within 5-15 minutes. Hurricanes are scarce, normally short-lived, and can be predicted.
• Permits: Wrightsville Beach requires one (min. $125, call their town hall) but the 74+ others we serve do not. Fort Fisher State Park and Myrtle Beach State Park require permits too.
• City of Myrtle Beach restricts most beach weddings, please click this link for that info
• Most ceremonies last 7 – 15 minutes and the whole event may take about 1 hour, depending on guests, location, stragglers, wardrobe hiccups, weather, etc.
• Guests would travel to your hometown for a home wedding, so they can just as easily travel to the shore and this doubles as a vacation!For best results follow the instructions your hired vendors give you. Ask questions, ask for advice! Communicating clearly and openly helps. If you need help, ask. Now go have fun!

Pastor Margo Ross Sears is the Wedding Whisperer, a certified life coach, popular photographer, senior pastor of her church at Beachpeople Weddings. This featured article is published quarterly in a wedding magazine too! Read on….

Dear Wedding Whisperer,
Thanks in advance for any help you can offer us. We want to do a Unity Candle ceremony but its outdoors in the wind, and we might want to include our 3 small children… so what are some alternatives for us? Got ideas?
Janet & Chet, Wilmington

Dear Janet & Chet,
There are ideas! You are welcome! Sand ceremony, everyone with their own color comes is popular. OR you can use a bigger glass vessel and pour different colors of dry rice, beans, corn, barley, wheat, poppy seeds, sesame seeds, etc. If kids are babies or have physical issues, keep it simply—have a lovely, empty vase with water, and let everyone add their own flower or flowers to it. You can also pour sand or grains into a wedding frame box, or as a group assemble a simple Cross wedding kit together. Or you can give each child a keepsake bracelet or necklace or pin (right after you two exchange rings).

Dear Mrs. Whisperer,
My lovely and brave fiancée will be moving here from Panama to be my bride, bless her. We want to have our ceremony near my family in Wilmington, so do you have tips on getting a marriage license for a non-US citizen, please?
Sgt. Robert, US Army

Hello Sergeant,
Thank you for your service. Good news… NC marriage license laws are very foreigner friendly! Please call the New Hanover County Registrar of Deeds office to get their schedule of hours open, and which IDs they need from both of you: 910-798-7758. You both must go in-person to get one, and they take cash only. ¡Felicitaciones!

Dear Wedding Whisperer,
Length of a ceremony… I’m a former Catholic, never married, and my partner was raised agnostic. We want a non-denominational ceremony. How long does that take? Martha, Ohio

Dear Martha, For non-denominational the speaking part by itself takes averages 7-9 minutes. The shortest possible is about 5 seconds (only 1 short sentence + a valid license is required by law) and the longest ones are about 20 minutes. BTW, humans (a.k.a. guests and loved ones) get bored and wander off mentally after 12-15 minutes tops! Add on 5 more minutes for the processional and 10-15 minutes for guests to take seats or assemble and settle down, too.

Greetings Miz WW,
What is the coolest way you’ve seen people have a ring bearer? Judi, WVA

Hello Judi, I photographed a trained hawk bringing in the rings when the groom wore a glove with meat and whistled. The redtail hawk had the rings in a leg bag, and groom removed it while the hawk feasted on a snack. Then the trainer whistled for the hawk and it flew back to him. The 50 guests were silently amazed except an occasional whispered “oh!”
The second coolest was when the couple convinced her 6-year-old son that all ringbearers wear a bear costume to be a real “ring bear” so he would have wear one too! He looked adorable.

Hello Wedding Whisperer,
We love kids. We have relatives and friends with kids. We also love our expensive wedding plans for an elaborate celebration that does not include children or teens. There are too many elements that would bore them, and not much that would entertain a child, the food is sophisticated, and music quality is a priority, so crying and shrieking aren’t going to cut it. What is the current polite way to tell guests “no kids please”? Ernesto & Toni, Carolina Beach

Hello Ernesto,
Sounds like a great time! People use their wedding website to announce “adults only” and avoid negative wording on the invite such as no kids or restricted. Name precisely WHO is invited clearly on the envelope and invite. You can explain the noise level, adult levels of entertainment and complex menu are not suitable for children. Be sure to send invites several weeks or months in advance so parents can find sitters. Immediately call any parents who miss the hint; thank them for replying, and politely explain that this is a date-night event, not a family affair, and in the rollout convo mention their lovely kids would be bored and hungry, so let them enjoy a movie and games night at home.

Dear Wedding Whisperer,
Why do people put out baskets of paint brushes on the boardwalks at beach weddings? Mattie, Myrtle Beach

Dear Mattie, those are for inlander guests who are not accustomed to Beach Life at the coast… They can use the brushes to get sand off their feet and shoes when they step off the strand. And then the brush becomes a souvenir if you decorate it!

A popular, western custom of bringing good luck, protection, abundance and purity to the couple is to have “something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.” Here are creative ideas for ways to have these in your wedding (not just on the bride):

SOMETHING OLD:

• Use an old photo of a departed loved one in a frame pendant tied to the bouquet
• Turn mom’s veil into a bouquet wrapper, or her dress into a fancy handbag or handkerchief
• Pin an old brooch to the bouquet or your dress, or inside the dress
• Put an old penny or dime in your shoe (borrow it!)
• Rent an old style limo, or borrow dad’s cool old muscle car or grandma’s shiny old Cadillac
• Use antique furniture to decorate for reception
• Play classical rock, jazz, blues, country or symphony music
• Dance with grandparents and elders, get your photo with them!
• Antique jewelry from vintage stores and antique shops or online
• Groom can follow another old tradition of giving his bride a (vintage) pearl necklace
• Bride can give him antique/vintage cuff links or wristwatch

SOMETHING NEW:

• New dress or shoes, new hairbobs, makeup, flowers, etc
• Groom can give his bride a NEW pearl necklace
• Bride can give new men’s jewelry or new baubles to her bridesmaids

SOMETHING BORROWED:

• Copy a quote or prayer from your parents’ wedding vows
• Borrow your loved one’s dress or accoutrements
• Use mom and dad’s cake cutter/server
• Rent your dress or tuxedos
• A coin in the bride or groom’s shoes
• Acquire earrings or bracelet or hairpiece and return it later
• Borrow parents or grandparents’ cake topper
• Accept someone’s handkerchief
• Rent a nice (old, new or blue) car for the occasion

SOMETHING BLUE:

• Azure neckties, socks, shoes or pocket-squares for men’s attire
• Embroider with colbalt thread a date/initials inside your clothes or a hanky
• Powder blue dress for bride or her attendants
• Sky blue garters and/or flowers are popular
• Navy napkins, runners, glasses or menus on reception tables
• Blue favors… blue candy or blue wrapper condoms, maybe
• Nail polish or toe polish, and/or blue eyeshadow
• Teal ribbons on bouquets
• Bluish paper or ribbons on gifts or envelopes
• Cobalt getaway vehicle instead of white

In a hurry, need it fast and cheap? Borrow an old safety pin, rip off a bit of new, blue paper or fabric and pin that inside your clothes.
~ author, Margo Ross Sears has written over 1,400 wedding ceremonies as www.beachpeopleweddings.com